NetChurch of God pamphlet

 is a newspaper appearing in Deus Ex.

Transcript
HAVE YOU BEEN SAVED?

"I AM HE THAT LIVETH AND WAS DEAD; AND, BEHOLD, I AM ALIVE FOR EVERMORE, AMEN."

Join the NetChurch of God and know that your immortal soul will truly be saved -- backed-up on a datacube and stored in our secure, hardened crypt until the day of Rapture. Don't trust your soul to other religions that promise similar services based on vague, ambiguous, and unverifiable promises of forgiveness and acceptance. "THAT WHOSOEVER BELIEVETH IN HIM SHOULD NOT PERISH BUT HAVE ETERNAL LIFE."

The exact location of our crypts is a closely guarded secret, but rest easy knowing that they're protected by miles of rock somewhere beneath the Appalachian Mountains. Even in the event of a catastrophe (Biblical or otherwise), an auxillary nuclear generator will insure that your soul's checksum is verified daily for millenia to come, while surface sensors constantly monitor for the Last Days when the crypts will be opened and all souls will be free to ascend to Heaven. WHY TRUST YOUR SOUL TO ANYTHING ELSE?

NetChurch of God @ God:999.7.7.7